July 28: Unspoken dreams

 Oh boy. Another post where I can write about that big dumb novel I want to write one day. No, I don't think I'll do that. People are tired of reading about it and they're tired of hearing me talk about it. What was once a contender's project has turned into a fool's errand. I shouldn't talk about it anymore. No one wants to hear "I'm going to do it" but I hope that one day, they'll be happy to hear me say "I did it."

But I think I will take some time to talk about an unspoken dream I've had for a very long time. I've told a few people about it in passing but I never really dwelled on it. It's something I may do one day if I have the resources to to start it up and I think that if I couple it with my magic shows, I could probably get a decent return on investment.

The dream is this: One day, I'd like to have a Punch and Judy show.

What is a Punch and Judy show? Well, it's the oldest puppet show in history. Punch and Judy shows have been running around the world for the past 400 years, though mostly in England. It is a very English show and that's part of the charm. My ancestry is mostly British and I'd like to do something that pays homage to it.

Here is the basic plot of a Punch and Judy show: Punch is a very bad man. He disrespects his wife, drops his baby out of a window, beats up a clown, has his sausages stolen by a crocodile, dies and is resurrected by a doctor, mocks and then beats up a police officer before the hangman comes for him The final scene usually shows Mr. Punch tricking the hangman into hanging himself. In some shows, Mr. Punch is visited by the devil and winds up outsmarting him too. It is a dreadful show but kids love it. 

Well they used to love it anyway. Nowadays, Punch and Judy shows are getting flack for "glorifying domestic violence." Tom and Jerry cartoons don't get flack for glorifying pet abuse but I digress.

I think Punch and Judy shows work because they are so over-the-top. The Punch and Judy puppets are as far as Jim Henson as you can get. They can't change their facial expressions, they're not endowed with human qualities, they are closer to the Three Stooges than The Color Purple. It's slapstick all the way through. But there is a moral. The moral is "don't be like Mr. Punch."

Mr. Punch is always an ugly character with a hooked red nose and a chin so upturned that it almost touches said nose. He always has an evil grin on his face. He is a charming psychopath. You love him and hate him at the same time.

I already have my own Punch and Judy script half written in my head. My script will have the usual slapstick bits but there will also be subtle digs at Henry Morgenthaler, socialism, and my own inability to do a convincing British accent. Oh if the opportunity presents itself for me to do a Punch and Judy show and bring it on the county fair circuit, I know I'll have a lot of fun. I just hope my audiences will as well.