Dec. 9: You do you

She was wearing a wedding dress as she danced by herself in the bar.
 

I was in my late 20s, had just moved to Ontario, and was treating myself to a night on the town in Toronto. I’d just gotten paid, I had no obligations, and was in an extremely good mood. So I approached the dancing bride and offered to buy drinks for her and her new husband. 

She ignored me and continued to dance. She did so for the next three hours, spinning around, ad infinitum, as the DJ played cruddy dance beats from the late 90s. She left, alone, around one in the morning. Later, the bartender told me that the lady had been a regular on the city’s bar scene for years. She didn’t always wear a wedding dress, but usually she did. 

I think about her now and then, wondering what she w


as hoping to accomplish by dressing as a bride while visiting dance clubs. I know that it’s none of my business, that her masquerade wasn’t harming anyone. Today, if she were to tell people about her evening pastime, we might be tempted to reply with that perfect 2020 rejoinder, which is “you do you.” 

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So I looked “you do you” up on urbandictionary.com. Here are some of the suggested definitions: “the act of doing what one believes is the right decision.” Or “a response when somebody constantly asks for suggestions, but doesn't actually need or listen to them.” Or “the act of doing the things that you normally do. “ Or “Millennial way of passive aggressively telling someone to go f___ themselves.”

Basically, “you do you” is just championing absolute individualism at the expense of collective responsibility.”  

To wit: “But I don’t want to pay my taxes. I want to spend the money on vodka and a weekend in Vegas.”  

Enabler: “You do you, man.” 

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Note-a-day is just another example of "you do you." I like writing it. It's fun. But I suspect that it's just narcissistic navel-gazing that doesn't do much to edify or make the world a better place. That's why I get so jazzed when other people agree to do note-a-day too. It means it's not just about me, it's about a mutual celebration of the creative spirit.

You do you indeed.


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